Two wrong feet and f***ing ugly shoes (my 2c on workplace bullying)
Lisa Geraghty
The immortal words of Julia Roberts as Erin Brockovich in the Oscar winning 2000 film of the same name. It was one of the cleverest, most ass-kicking comebacks I had ever heard. I still use it. It makes me smile. Sometimes I think of it when I am talking to people who are struggling with other people’s bad behaviour, whether that is in the workplace or personally. I feel myself wanting them to summon the sass of Ms Brockovich and put their tormentors back in their box. Unfortunately, managing bullies and nasty behaviour is not nearly as easy as this.
The law defines bulling as “repeated, inappropriate behaviour, direct or indirect, whether verbal, physical or otherwise, conducted by one or more person against another or others, at the place of work and/or in the course of their employment, which could reasonably be regarded as undermining the individual’s right to dignity at work.” It is considered a breach of health and safety legislation. The fundamental element of this is that the behaviour undermines a person’s right to dignity. And dignity, my friends, means that we are worthy of honour and respect. Simple. Maybe not?
In 2020, a revised Code of Practice for employers and employees was issued (S.I. No. 674/2020 - Industrial Relations Act 1990 (Code of Practice for Employers and Employees on the Prevention and Resolution of Bullying at Work) Order 2020). Failure by an employer to follow the Code is not an offence, per se, but it is admissible in legal proceedings in general, and so acts as a deterrent in allowing bullying to happen in the workplace. The Code attempts to differentiate between behaviour that constitutes bullying and other types of behaviour which do not fit the definition. According to the Code, a once off incident, albeit a perceived affront to the dignity of the complainant, is not considered to be bullying. Examples of bullying in the workplace are exclusion with negative consequences, spreading of gossip or malicious rumours, or repeatedly manipulating a person’s job content and targets. Examples of behaviour which are not defined as bullying are expressing differences of opinion strongly, offering constructive feedback, guidance, or advice about work-related behaviour which is not of itself welcome, or reasonable corrective action taken by an employer relating to the management and direction of employees (for example managing a worker’s performance, taking reasonable disciplinary actions, or assigning work).
When an employee believes that they are being bullied, there are a number of legal options for dealing with it. As it is technically a health and safety issue, the Health and Safety Authority (HSA) could be asked to step in and investigate. This may be an option to deal with situations where there is a culture of bullying in the organisation. Where there have been procedural deficits, and the employer does not have or implement an appropriate grievance procedure to facilitate an informal and a formal approach to a resolution, then the Workplace Relations Commission (WRC) is in a position to advise on mediation or hear a case. In the event that the experience has led the complainant to suffer a health breakdown and financial loss, the Personal Injuries Assessment Board (PIAB) might be able to help. Every case is individual and should be judged on its own facts. Richard Grogan, acclaimed employment law solicitor, would have you believe “that’s the law, and that’s a fact”. Unfortunately, for the person on the receiving end of abuse, life is not as straightforward as this.
Earlier this year I was speaking to a young woman, an employee in a small family run business, who purged tales of bullying and abuse in her workplace. She was crying. She sounded exhausted. She was apologising to me because she was too weak to deal with it herself and did not know what to do. She was not sleeping. She was barely eating. She was losing weight. She was fighting with her husband because he wanted her to leave her job, but she loved her job. She was beating herself up because she was so distracted that she wasn’t giving her young children enough time. She was worried about how her professional reputation was being damaged because of the conflict with her employer. As I listened to this story, I heard an employee asking for professional advice, but in that moment, I knew that I was also listening to a woman asking for help. I duly talked her through the law, and yes, Mr Grogan, I applied it to the facts, and then I asked her what she really wanted. She wanted her life back.
Bullying of any kind is a destructive and scarring experience for most people. How we deal with it is dependent on our values, our self-belief, our self-worth, and our resilience. We all have these things. Some of us can find them when we need them, and for others they seem to be in a vault somewhere that needs to be unlocked. I was lucky enough never to have been bullied as a child. I was brought up in a house where everyone was entitled to dignity and respect, where my parents did not gossip about our neighbours, and everyone was entitled to get on with their own lives. I never learned the skills to deal with bullies. I didn’t need to. So, when as an adult I was bullied to within an inch of my life by people I was close to and trusted, it was a lifechanging experience. I lived to tell the tale and I learned a lot.
Now, having quoted the Codes of Practice to this woman, and offered guidance on the workings of a grievance procedure, bla bla, my advice was this. You cannot change people or their behaviour. You can, however, choose whether you will allow them and their insecurities to remain in your life. Ask yourself - what is the worst that will happen if I walk away from this? I will lose a job that I love? There will be other jobs. Better jobs. I will risk losing career progression and financial security? There will be other opportunities. Better opportunities. Life is about making the most of every day, one day at a time. Do I fight this thing head on, bearing in mind how much energy and head space I will surely invest, or do I walk away? Sometimes in life we need to remind ourselves of our worth and refuse to compromise how we believe we should be treated. Thank the bullies for the lesson, draw a line under them and walk away. In the words of the literary genius, Taylor Swift, “shake it off”.